How do you mend a broken heart?
by Lillipop265
Summary: Hermione/Ron one-sided currently , set in their sixth year. Rated T for safety. No longer a one-shot :
1. Acceptance is the key

**A/N: **So, yet another idea that happened to creep its way into my mind. It's more Hermione/Ron one-sided stuff, which is sad but you know, there were like 7 books of it. Talking of which I don't actually own anything here (as you've probably guessed.) Might be a one shot, but I could make it a series, let me know what you think.

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A figure huddled in the windowsill, leant against the stone wall, gazing longingly at the happy residents of the outside world, weak, vulnerable and hopeless. That was me.

In the distance I could make out Ron and Lavender, holding hands and laughing. I felt pathetic when I realised just how much I'd give to be in her position for a split second. To feel his fingers intertwined with my own, hear his laughter ringing through my ears, feel his breath ghosting across my face. I wanted his arms round_ my_ waist, his lips on _my_ skin, his kind words lingering in _my_ mind.

Every time I saw her stupid, smiling face the anger boiled through me, the tension pumped through my veins. I longed to see my shaking hand collide with her smug features, I never liked her much anyway.

Mind, it wasn't her fault she was dating Ron, maybe if he'd have known my feelings before none of this would've happened. If he wasn't so damn blind to every hint I've ever dropped or every time I've looked into his eyes and been lost within those hypnotising, amber orbs, this situation may have been entirely avoidable.

Who am I kidding? Why would he take an interest in me? I had nothing over her, I was just book-loving, bushy-haired, boring Hermione. She was prettier than me, more 'fun' and certainly more experienced. She had looks and reputation on her side, what did I have?

Knowledge? Good in a crisis, fine for friendship but not really 'girlfriend material'. The jealousy stretched throughout my body in an infuriating manner, triggering my tear ducts. The imaginary barrier I was holding in place collapsed and the tears flowed freely down my cheeks, slipping down my face like rain down the castle walls.

The door opened.

"Hermione?" It was Ginny, her voice thick with concern and sympathy. Pity, just what I needed. I wiped the salty tracks furiously from my face, hopefully before she noticed them

"Hermione, what's up?" I couldn't reply, I was too close to breaking point to reply. I just blinked hurriedly and continued to glare out of the window. Ginny looked out and spotted the problem instantly.

"Oh. You and Ron…" Her voice trailed off.

"Me and Ronald what Ginny?" I'd snapped at her, I didn't intend to, she ignored it anyway.

"You like Ron." she stated simply, as though it really was that obvious, maybe it was.

"Don't." I'd mumbled my denial at her, I knew it was childish, I knew it was pointless, but I really didn't want to have this discussion.

Ginny had crossed the room by now, taking her place on the windowsill opposite me, her chin resting on her knees, feet parallel to my own. Then she glared at me, staring right through my lies into the depths of my soul. She continued to survey me with this expectant look until I caved in.

I broke the eye contact. "Fine." I admitted it, but I wasn't about to sit there and pour my heart out to the boy in question's sister.

Her face lit up in victory, but she held her smile back from anything but her eyes.

"So?" She didn't seem to entirely comprehend the situation.

I gestured out of the window, "he's with _her." _The giggling couple were still in the grounds and my voice was filled with a disgusting amount of jealousy, a hint of viciousness underlining it.

"He's trying to make you jealous." That was Ginny's suggestion, a typical comfort phrase, something you _want_ to hear though you know it's probably not true.

I took a deep breath to steady myself, I was going to need it if the tears were to remain internal.

"Time to face facts Ginny, he's never liked me, never will, everyone just needs to accept that. He's with her now, they're happy, I'm just being a spiteful cow because I haven't got anyone." My voice was weak, like Ginny's false suggestions, I bit back the sadness, I wouldn't let it show. Leaving my comment lingering in the air, I swiftly turned and made my exit.

I left the door to the tower swinging open, Ginny still trying to think of something to say and ran down the stairs two at a time. Only when I was safely locked in the girls bathroom did I allow myself to face the truth and let the tears flow freely down my face. I finally accepted what could never be, It hurt, but maybe this was the first step to being free.

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**A/N: **I'm not sure how well this went so, Reviews would be awesome again, I'll even send happy thoughts to all those that do :) If you do review, thanks in advance and let me know if you think I should continue this.


	2. Ignorance is bliss

**A/N:** Big thanks to all the reviewers/ people who encouraged me to continue. Hope you enjoy :)

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I needed to see him, I mean really physically needed to. Every time I thought about him, where before they'd been smiles, now my breath caught in my throat like someone had cut off my oxygen. Desperation clouded my mind, I couldn't concentrate on anything, not even schoolwork. I was skipping breakfast, rushing off from lunch to the library, he'd never go there. I was deliberately avoiding him, depriving myself of the need to till my whole body ached with want. I was being pathetic.

I had to be in the same room as him, in lessons, the common room, but I didn't have to speak to him, go any closer than necessary or make contact with those gorgeous eyes, that's what I really needed. So, if I was that desperate, why not stop avoiding him? I tried, believe me I tried, but I couldn't stand that either. If I let myself see him, without it being beyond my control, not only was I giving in but I was providing my brain with more material to invade my thoughts. More images of him and _her_. More visions to cause me pain.

Maybe he wasn't the problem. After all, I'd experienced a lack of a desired relationship with Ron for long enough. Something had changed, someone 'new on the scene' as they say. _She__was there now_. She sat next to him in the mornings, walked with him to lessons, sat on his lap in the common room, draping herself all over him, arms round is neck, hands in his hair, lips against his hair. _Lavender Brown_, she sickened me.

I suppose I shouldn't blame her, she was only following instinct, aiming for whatever guy she could get, praying on anyone that was popular and attainable. She wasn't to know I liked him, I'd spent enough effort hiding it, but she still shouldn't display their disgusting excuse for a relationship so openly.

She was much harder to avoid, she slept just five feet away. There she was every night, happy, giggling, talking _all_ the time.

"What's it like, having a boyfriend?" That was Parvati, beginning the nightly occurrence of questioning Lavender.

A girlish giggle flooded the dorm room, typical Lavender, always so damn pleased about everything.

"Oooh, it's just so nice to know someone cares for you, it's like they'll always be there, you know?"

Know?… I wish. I mean, I'd had that date with Krum to the Yule ball in forth year, but that was just friendship, nothing more. He'd never done anything but kiss me on the cheek, nor had anyone else actually. No one had ever shown an interest, and why would they?

There was a chorus of "awww"s for Lavender's comment from the other girls in the room. I stayed behind my curtains 'sleeping'. I couldn't see it, but I could tell Lavender was grinning, she always was.

"Shhhh, you'll wake Hermione." She didn't sound concerned.

"Well, she shouldn't be sleeping then, she never joins in."

…and I had no desire to.

"That's not fair," Lavender again, I wish she wouldn't stick up for me, it makes it so much harder to hate her. "It's not as though she has the experiences to share." About that hating thing, it was getting a little easier. Fair enough, she was right, but she was making assumptions, she'd never asked.

I heard agreement from my other roommates.

"Yeah."

"Poor girl."

"She's missing out on so much."

Thanks for the pity guys, not exactly a confidence boost.

"Anyway, Lavender…" Okay then, didn't take them long to get over the sympathetic moment "…How far have you gone with Ron?" Her tone was suggestive, expectant.

Did we really need to hear this? She was jumping into his lap every five seconds as it was, that gave the imagination enough information to work with.

"Oh, we've just kissed." Just? The jealousy of that alone was driving me insane, it boiled right through me, tensed each muscle and burned into my mind, "…but we're talking about going further, Ronnie mentioned it to me just the other day." Great.

There were a few small gasps and I could feel the surprise hanging in the air but whilst excitement surrounded them, all I could feel was fear. Fear that she'd get there first, that they'd stay together, get married, have kids. I couldn't bear the thought that the mother of his children wouldn't be me, but _her_. _She'd_ be the one calling him in _her_ lunch break to see when they'd both be home, _she'd _be arguing with him over whose turn it was to cook dinner, _she'd _be wrapping _her_ arms around his waist at the end of the day, soothing his stress with _her_ lips against his. I shouldn't expect to have all that, it was selfish, but the thought of my future being any different was something I couldn't stand and to think of someone else spending their life with him made me feel physically sick. So that I could actually feel the vomit churn in my stomach, much like the direction the current conversation was moving towards made me feel.

"Do you think you'll you know? Go all the way?"

I had definitely heard enough, I wouldn't listen anymore. I reached across to my beside table to close my hand around my wand. I aimed at the curtains surrounding me and muttered "muffilato." They never heard me over their laughter.

The silence sank in around me, but it was far less suffocating than listening to them. Hours later, I finally managed to sleep.

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**A/N: **So, there you go, please click the big button with the green writing? You're amazing if you do :)


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